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depression
March 2009 
prospective "pod" notes
Posted on Mar 17th, 2006
by 
rhobherto
rhobherto
[note from bri asks me to consider enlisting here as "ambassador" and podkeeper. expressed some doubts {link not working -- see blog post: 'uh-oh! invitation to become an ambassador'} about the answer]
fording the big blue -- encountering depression
possible headings and jumping off spots:
- introductions: no magic beans here, from this podkeeper, but commiseration.
- got this infinite sadness breathing down my neck. if i turn around and acknowledge it,
will the damned beast move in and set up house? will i be stigmatized as "crazy?"
- feminine (accepting, embracing) approaches vs. masculine ("we'll beat this!," triumph
of the will) strategies
- depression as a "bad" connection or bandwidth issue
- medicine
- books (always more books!)
- suicide, transcendant ego-cide, or something else?
notes on feminine approaches vs. masculine strategies:
the secret to change: do something else.
and it's follow-on: what is not used becomes obsolete.
and it's follow-on: what is not used becomes obsolete.
by sitting in depression, do we somehow enable it? by allowing this sadness, this bleakness, this challenge to hope a seat in our soul, does it only wear it ruts deeper into our neural pathways? is a tony robbins-esque approach -- "engage (instead) your passion" -- the one for me?
converservely, why not enter into the heart of this darkness? perhaps the way is not over or around or by avoidance, but through. still, its boundaries can seem only to recede and expand beyond this allowing. how much of this can "i" hold in my heart? how much more can "i" withstand?
can suffering ennoble us? are there logical limits? does true compassion draw a line and oblige us to intervene when faced with "unnecessary" suffering? some of this "opening of the heart" to my/your/our suffering is one thing. but, my gawd, depression is crippling and ruining (my/your) life. we must act!
converservely, why not enter into the heart of this darkness? perhaps the way is not over or around or by avoidance, but through. still, its boundaries can seem only to recede and expand beyond this allowing. how much of this can "i" hold in my heart? how much more can "i" withstand?
can suffering ennoble us? are there logical limits? does true compassion draw a line and oblige us to intervene when faced with "unnecessary" suffering? some of this "opening of the heart" to my/your/our suffering is one thing. but, my gawd, depression is crippling and ruining (my/your) life. we must act!
notes on depressions as "bad" connection
what is this mysterious "vital force" that beats our hearts and breaths our breaths? and how is it that each of us is "dialed in" to this force? without reference to their general stage or state of consciousness, don't we all know someone we regard as a "dynamo;" someone "full of energy?" conversely, a bout with depression can make pulling on your socks seem like a gargantuan endeavor. the reserve or well of energy in someone who is struggling through depression can be utterly empty and dry. if you ordinarily "surf the net" with a "broadband" connection but, on occasion, encounter connection or "choked" bandwidth problems, that's an analogous and similarly frustrating parallel to this encounter with depression. your anticipated, impending internet/life experience is, more or less, dead in the water. in strictly "bioenergetic" terms, we are, perhaps, not unlike these machines on our desks and some of us -- the dynamos -- are dialed in T1(or higher!)-fashion. and, perhaps, depression's lull can be boiled down to some "failed to connect" or "limited bandwidth" issue. hardware or software conflict?
what is this mysterious "vital force" that beats our hearts and breaths our breaths? and how is it that each of us is "dialed in" to this force? without reference to their general stage or state of consciousness, don't we all know someone we regard as a "dynamo;" someone "full of energy?" conversely, a bout with depression can make pulling on your socks seem like a gargantuan endeavor. the reserve or well of energy in someone who is struggling through depression can be utterly empty and dry. if you ordinarily "surf the net" with a "broadband" connection but, on occasion, encounter connection or "choked" bandwidth problems, that's an analogous and similarly frustrating parallel to this encounter with depression. your anticipated, impending internet/life experience is, more or less, dead in the water. in strictly "bioenergetic" terms, we are, perhaps, not unlike these machines on our desks and some of us -- the dynamos -- are dialed in T1(or higher!)-fashion. and, perhaps, depression's lull can be boiled down to some "failed to connect" or "limited bandwidth" issue. hardware or software conflict?
[to be updated]
pod killer? people trading notes about their encounters with depression is one thing. would a "pod" on this subject entail liabilities; require a "disclaimer -- no substitute for competent, professional advice." should a pod on this subject, if zaadz is to have one, be moderated by a "pro?"
Access: PublicTagged with: depression
Sure. Suffering can ennoble us. Like it did me many times before. Then one day, I found out that the suffering of others ennobles me even more, and it became clear to me that I didn't need to feel depression anymore.
So you have been invited to join the ambassador program. Did you indeed accept, and are contemplating what your Pod will be about? (in reading this blog post, things seem a bit unsure) Be wicked! (as in candle wick) :-)
live in passion
Interesting questions, r. I think the thing to keep in mind is the intention. If your intention is to use depression to help people spread light on their shadows so they can grow into healthier more empowered individuals, then it's all good… just make sure the intention is threaded into the discussions. If, on the other hand, your intention is to make everyone depressed and commit suicide so you can go over to their houses and steal money from their wallets, that would be slightly disconcerting. So, I say follow your highest intention in the greatest service of the world, and it should be fine.
i like the “wick” analogy alot. and i'm going to have to spend a fair amount of time parked at your front page, tru, following your collection of pod links. also, your advice, matthew, to keep in mind what our intentions are is among the best “operating instructions” we can share with another. thank you tru and matthew!